Really? A Year?
The first good thing to happen to me last year, was I found the love of my life. Yes I know that sounds really soppy but you know when people say "you'll know The One when you find him/her"? Well I never believed it, but hey guess what from first hand experience I can say it is true. Now I'm not going to write in this post that it happens to everyone, because I know couples that love each other very much and that wasn't love at first sight and they didn't "just know" however in my case I did "just know" and I'm glad to say he feels the same about me. So ten months on and three holidays later we are still going through our honeymoon phase. Well if truth be told I think we have been through that and come out the other side still as equally happy with each because ten months is a long honeymoon period. Can you imagine getting married then going on your honeymoon for ten months that would just be epic! and cost a hell of a lot.
Moving on to the second good thing, now to explain this one I have to go into a bad patch first. Every month (if I'm lucky) for the past 3 years, I used to have a meltdown. It would normally only last a day maybe two before I picked myself and carried on with my life, but it was a meltdown of pure unhappiness and a feeling of being lost. My everyday nature is that of a bubbly, outgoing person, however during these days that person remained on the outside but as soon as I got home buckets of tears rained out of me. It was like someone had turned the tap on. What about I hear you all asking, the simple answer is life. I was enjoying my job, so what was the problem there? It wasn't what I wanted to do with my life I didn't want to be stuck on a shop floor selling jewellery all my life, working all the hours under the sun and not really feeling like I got a day off. (I exaggerate I did love my job but during these times this is how I felt). I had a roof over my head and food in my belly, so again what's the problem? Well, yes I did have a roof over my head which in some cases is a lot better than most people, and it pains me to say it but some people don't even have that. So what was my problem why was I being so selfish? I wanted a house to call my own, even if it was rented. Not a small make-do room housing myself and my two cats, plus all of my belongings which used to fill a house not a room as you can imagine its fairly crowded, which then lead to it looking messy because there wasn't enough space, and now understand why it was upsetting me.
Each month I would run this round and round in my head, what can I do? I could change my job so it is more suited to where I wanted to go in life, but my main problem was I wasn't really sure where that was. Okay well I had a good job I could start renting somewhere. Now that is a good idea however as soon as I was paying rent it meant I had to stay in my job until I found another one and not flit between jobs as my fancy took me. So logically surely I should find another job then think of finding a house. But I never did the Uni thing so I'm not really qualified in anything to get a good job other than retail, the area I didn't really want to be in anymore. So want did I do I hear you ask just cut to the chase. I handed in my notice at work. I paid for an online course in Wedding and Event Planning and since the new year that is what I have been doing! Big change number two! I would not recommend to anyone who has bills to pay or mouths to feed or who has an addiction to shopping to leave your job without finding another even if it is part time. However in my position that was the only route I could see to make me full time happy again so I took it. I have now run out of money and looking for another job, partly because I want to go shopping and partly because I want to move in with my boyfriend.
So all in all I guess this blog post, although bringing you up to date with my current situation and briefly outlining the important things that have happened within the year, has an under lying message if you want something that badly, you go and get it! Act then think later. If you can do something now to put the wheels in motion do it. Just have the courage, I was so scared when I left my job to started studying again, I hated it at school but now I love it and just remember if you don't try you wont know and nobody is looking at you making mistakes, no one was put on this earth fully grown knowing everything. Everything that you are scared of someone else has done it before and guess what they have pulled through and don't regret a single moment. And with love just be patient, and put in the effort, look good because you want to. If you feel good and love yourself then you'll find that others will love you too.
Hope you've enjoyed this catch up post if you have any questions or just want to chat just leave a comment below
Love You
Little Lelo xxx
Comments
Post a Comment